Disco de Helmet: “Size Matters”

It did seem too good to be true. One of my favorite bands and arguably one of the most important heavy bands of the past 15 years has tried to rise mightily from the ashes...only to falter. Things like these always sound surefire at first. Not to insult Page in any way, but this comeback sort of reminded me of the "resurrected" Guns n' Roses. Both are hotly anticipated, and both only contain one original member, the frontman. Both are made up of talented musicians, replacing the originals, which sounds like a good idea. But sadly, no it doesn't work.

Page has always been Helmet's mastermind, but another thing integral about the band was the rhythm section of Henry Bogdan and John Stanier. Since Chris Traynor played bass on this record, I can't really compare ex-Anthrax bass player Frank Bello to Bogdan. I'm sure he's competent enough. But John Tempesta, himself an excellent drummer from the White Zombie days, doesn't fit the Stanier shoes very well. Tempesta's drumming is very traditional metal, but Stanier's mechanical single kick grooves really meshed well with Page's oddtimed guitar. It's just not the same. The songs themselves don't veer closely to nu metal, they're just dull. That's the only way I can explain it. The songwriting just lacks any real inspiration.

There are a plethora of good albums this fall. Sadly, Size Matters is not one of them. I can only hope Page can reclaim his former glory in some way that doesn't bastardize his band's legacy.

Paige Hamilton sings "Aim low" during the first track which is prophetic. If long time HELMET fans keep your aim low and simply enjoy the fact there is some new Hamilton music then you'll be fine. Another reviewer was spot on saying this is more like a Paige Hamilton solo album. Without Bogdan and Stainer there is no HELMET.If ever there was a power trio it was HELMET. If your introduction to HELMET is the recent airplay of See You Dead you should really start at the begining. Buy Strap it On first. The production values stink but you'll get an idea of their style. Then buy Meantime. That should be enough to get you hooked.If your unfamiliar with the band their bio is pretty simple. Take a guy with a Masters Degree in jazz guitar..a classically trained drummer..and a bass player who loves Hawaiian music..dress them up like surfers from a summer J Crew catalog..and naturally you end up with the tightest aneurysm-inducing music to come out of the early 90's music boom.

Helmet will never eclipse their high water mark, the classic "Meantime" that thundered through the speakers and inspired a million migraines. Not that this is a bad thing.

Paige Hamilton, who at times sounds eerily like Ozzy Osbourne, is the heart and soul behind Helmet. Like the late Denis D' Amour (Piggy) of Voi Vod, Hamilton infuses his demolition yard guitars with jazz, especially in his soloes that somehow harken back to bebop. Imagine Wes Montgomery in a food processor.

"Size Matters" is a big improvement over the muddy production of "Betty", and is driven by the excellent drummer John Tempesta of White Zombie fame and anchored with the help of Anthrax bassist Frank Bello. The songs are lyrically smart, the arrangements clipped and guitars up front.

It's metal on the edge of chaos, and with Helmet's musical cousins Prong, the aforementioned Voi Vod and the late great Pantera, the last bastion of dangerous rock and roll left.

Get "Meantime" too, while you're at it.

IMO the old Helmet was simply amazing. The new Size Matters CD is NOT old Helmet. I was suprised to find that it was Page singing because it doesn't sound at all like him. Although some songs hold similar sounds as the old Helmet albums, it's still lacks Helmet's old edge. It's just too mainstream, normal stuff you hear on the radio. So I would suggest if you want the same old Helmet you don't get this album or you'll have a nice looking coaster.

No, this is not Born Annoying.

No, this is not Strap it On.

No, this is not Meantime.

First off, let me say that asking a die-hard Helmet fan which is his favourite Helmet song is like asking a cop what his favourite gun is.

if you are expecting to hear identical riffs off a Helmet album made before 1994 then don't waste your time. If you you were expecting the Gandhi album to be released and were let down, here it is in another form. The term "Heavy Rock" is subjective so keep in mind these guys are in thier 40's.

In order to dig this album you must be a Page fan. Disgustingly good riffs are present in this album, although one must be open minded to find them. Oddly enough, the tracks "Unwound", "Last Breath", and the opening track "Smart", could have easily been placed on Aftertaste and no one would have complained. "Throwing Punches" is reminiscent of Bettyesque B sides and "Surgery" screams Mid 90's. Without going into detail of each song, strong comparisons can be drawn to the new material and the old. The production of this album far surpasses any other Helmet album and that can only be done by working with the best in the business.

Keep in mind, Size Matters is not your older brother's Helmet.

It is definitely a continuation of where they left off seven years ago and it is a good stepping stone of where they (or should i say 'He') are/is headed in the future.