Disco de Primus: “Sailing the Seas of Cheese”

Here's a story... I was over at my friend's house and he asks me if I have ever heard of the band Primus. I said yes because I heard Jerry was a Race Car Driver on the radio. He put on a DVD called Animals should not try to act like People or something like that and played all these WEIRD primus vids!! The band instantly started to grow on me and i bought their latest CD "Antipop". While it does have one of the best primus songs ever(In my opinion), Lacquer Head.. the rest of the tracks sound nothing like the Primus i heard on the DVD. So i got Sailing the Seas of Cheese and it is AWESOME!!! Garunteed you will love it. Here is a list of tracks and the score i give them.

1. Seas of Cheese - 7.5/10 A nice little intro featuring some interesting vocals.

2. Here come the b@stards - 8/10 I've seen multiple reviews bash this song for being repetitive. I love it for some reason and it is one of my favorites on the CD.

3. Sgt. Baker - 9.5/10 Definitely one of the best on the CD. This song has an interesting chorus about what drill sergeants do to their troops, i will read it for you to get you excited to hear it: I will rape your personality

4. American Life - 10/10 Again.. another amazing song, Primus tends to bunch the highlights of the cd together. The song definitely has a MUCH more depressing note to it then the first 3 tracks. It tells the stories of 3 immigrants and the woes that met them when they came to America.

5. Jerry was a Racecar Driver - 8/10 A lot of people consider this the best song on the CD. While it is a fantastic song, i disagree.

6. Eleven - 6/10 Unlike Here come the bastards, this song IS in fact, very repetitive.

7. Is it Luck? - 9/10 An awesome song featuring an awesome bassline

8. Grandad's Little Ditty - a boring little interlude track that i wont even bother to rate

9. Tommy the Cat - 10.5/10 In my opinion this is THE best track on the CD. It has it all, a kickass bassline AND kickass guitar solos!! Not to mention fantastic lyrics that tell the story of an alley cat named Tommy.

10. Sathington Waltz - 7/10 It's alright

11. Those damned blue collared Tweekers - 9/10 This is another great song on the cd. Great playing from Les and Lers.

12. Fish On - 9.5/10 Yet ANOTHER great song!!(starting to notice the vast number of great songs on this cd??) A slower song with funny lyrics about fishing and whatnot.

13. Los Bastardos - An outro track that sounds very similar Here come the bastards except it has some guy yelling. I wont rate it.

Primus are my personal favorite band, and as well as being one of the most talented, innovative, and downright insane bands over the past decade, they also made (in my own opinion) the greatest album in the history of rock. It has Les Claypool's great bass and nasal vocals, as well as insane drumming and even better guitar, adding to the quirkiness of it all. Although many consider Primus a metal band, a funk band, or a progressive band, I feel that they are truly in a league of their own, with no one else even coming close to their sheer musicianship. "Sailing The Seas..." has samples, the best bass ever, funny vocals and disturbing lyrics, as well as guitar shredding and up and down nonstop drumming. It is everything you should want in an album. If you are a teen struggling to fit in (I'm not...just cause'...yeah) don't listen to this. If you are looking for something unique, different, and better than everything you've ever bought, yeah, this is for you. Suggested tracks: Jerry Was A Race Car Driver, Those Damned Blue Collar Tweakers, Is It Luck? Suggested Bands: Mr. Bungle, Faith No More, El Stew. Suggested albums: Buckethead's Monsters And Robots, Primus' Pork Soda, mr. Bungle's California.

After buying several Primus albums, I bought this one. Well, first of all, I really like the storytelling. Each song is a sort of story. "Jerry Was A Racecar Driver" tells the story of a (you guessed it) racecar driver. "American Life" is a somber tale of poverty in life. My favorite is "Tommy The Cat," about a cool cat who talks about getting the hottest chick (or should I say 'cat') in town. But Primus' strength isn't only in storytelling. They are also very good at playing. Les Claypool's quirky bass playing, Larry LaLonde's haunting guitar playing, and Tim Alexander's rapid-fire drumming are a perfect combination. These guys are good. That's what made me a Primus fan. My only gripe with this CD is the production. There is NO bass in the sound! This isn't something you'd want to put in your car stereo and jack up the volume. Even now, whenever I listen to it, I feel like two needles are stabbing me in the ears. The sound is really thin. But fortunately, Primus fattened their sound later. In all, I recommend you buy this album.

Other than "Too Many Puppies" from Frizzle Fry, three songs from Sailing The Seas of Cheese heralded by initiation into Primus during my NMSU years-thank goodness for alternative college radio. Buying the full album later on, Sailing became and still is to date my favourite by Les Claypool and friends. The songs pulse and pound a lot more due to Claypool's uptempo bass and Tim Alexander's drumming. And Claypool's quirky vocals give Primus an added recognizable uniqueness.

The churning rowdy grind of bass and drums in the instrumental interlude of "Jerry Was a Race Car Driver" is what caught my ears to that song. An uptempo tune of the title character, who never finished first or last, but later had an unfortunate ending at an early age.

Equally rhythmic and upbeat is "Tommy the Cat," with Tom Waits playing the title character. The song recounts a tale of a hot feline looking for that he-cat of alleycats, namely the title cat. Waits himself sounds like he could do guest stints in Primus with his raconteur personality. This song was actually originally released live on their Suck On This album.

The third was "Those D-mned Blue Collar Tweakers," with a leisurely but playful rhythm beat, about how the title characters run the town, be it truckers, workers hammering in nails, or even someone hanging drywall who needs his fix to get the job done quick, but the town turns a blind eye. A funny reference to Papa Bush is "curious George's drug patrol is out here hunting snipe." At least I think it's Bush 41.

After the introductory ditty, Primus's killer rhythm section introduces "Here Come The Bastards" with a marching tempo. The concept of the title bastards introducing ideas-"something about a hammerhead shark, nosehairs and flatus" lends a bizarre Pythonseque turn to the song, but with Primus, well, what do you expect? The line of "anonymity is a virtue in this day and age" is universal enough, but ten years after this album was released, "flagrant misuse of Security" seems relevant, especially with HL Security's tramping on our freedoms. The song is reprised in "Los Bastardos" with the "here they come" refrain chanted over and over.

The brutality of the military mind, the "game of warfare" and the need to put recruits into lockstep is shown in the jamming "Sgt. Baker," with bits of wry humor mixed with Baker's character. The chorus goes in a left-right left-right marching rhythm: "I will r-pe your personality/pummel you with my own philosophy/strip you of your self-integrity/to make you all a bit like me." Uh, anyone STILL want to join the military after this?

Three verses tell sobering tales of people living the "American Life," of a Sicilian family who decides to go to Ellis Island after the father dies, Ong, a Laotian refugee earning minimum wage in LA, and perhaps the saddest, of Bob the unemployed veteran who sleeps in a cardboard box hunts for aluminum cans, yet somehow manages to maintain his dignity.

You know how people go, "That's what they say" or "They tell me"? Well, who's "they"? The pounding song "Eleven" is a paean for those who can't seem to conform to society or accept "this dim simplicity of law and order." Nothing treasonous about not seeing rhyme or reason in those rules.

The frantic tweeked out "Is It Luck" is a question asked in response to certain lines, be it something silly like "cyanide works oh so fast" to something serious like "there was food in your mouth today." A silly and great number. The fishing chronicles continue with "Fish On," about how a fisherman and his boys land a hundred pound sturgeon.

Better than Frizzle Fry, Primus sails the seas of success and skill with this one.

Seas of Cheese is Primus's major-label debut. Primus is a very strange band, heavy bass, weird sounding vocals, and good lyrics. is what makes them famous. Primus is weird, but not weird enough to the point where can't even listen to them. They have a very attractive sound that lures you in with "What the Hell is That?" I recommend this to anyone who hates modern music and wants something differant.